NaNoWriMo is drawing to a close....

As I near 50,000 words, I am not sure I will be able to stop.  First of all, though I will make 50,000 words today or tomorrow, my book will end up being longer.  This is a good thing, because I am sure it will need quite a bit of editing.  The NaNoWriMo website advises that after you finish your book, you leave it alone for a few weeks at the very least before you start the editing process.  I am scared...I will be the first to admit I didn't write anything close to the Great American Novel, but I think it is a solid first attempt.  People have been asking to read it...but that will make me so vulnerable.  They will judge me based on what I write...

When I tell someone about my book, they are all excited for me.  It is something that I have always dreamed of doing, but who knows if this book will ever be publishable (not that there aren't thousands of published books out there that suck more than mine).  Besides that, what if they hate it?  What if they start to read it and get bored?  What if they read it and say they love it, just to make me feel good (Mamma)?  What if they give me overly harsh  criticism (thinking of you, Rusty or Steven) and it's on a day when I am already slightly emotional?  I hope I don't get discouraged...

However, I already know what my next book will be.  Yep, not waiting until next November.  I desperately needed to come across NaNoWriMo to get me jump started, and now that I know writing a book is something I can do (it always seemed like such an enormously impossible and time consuming task) I think I am ready to write the book that I have been needing to for a long time.  The next one may be even less publishable, as I intend it to be a memoir and I'm not yet thirty years old.  Could I possibly write an engaging, entertaining memoir that connects with my audience at this age?  Well I don't know, but I'm going to write it anyway.

I am at 48,405 words.  I can't wait to send it in for validation, though I probably have 10,000 more words or so until it is finished.  By tomorrow I will be a NaNoWriMo Winner! ('Winning' only means you made it to 50,000 words by Nov. 30.)